Are Unicorns real? No, not any more. They used to be, though. I read some of the old legit books on them, and it turns out that they were smarter than humans, and real good with magic. Eventually, they became so powerful that they left this dimension. Supposedly, they did something to the world to give it magic. That doesn’t exactly fly with me, because if that’s true, then where did their magic come from? But yeah, supposedly there used to be unicorns.
Damn, work’s been slow the last few days! Must be why I’ve got the time to throw back a few drinks and ramble on about unicorns. Sometimes, I’ll see some old plant elemental or something at a bar mention them, always with respect. Says there’s nothing like the unicorns and there never will be. If they really are responsible for all the world’s magic, then they kind of screwed up. All people mostly seem to use it for is being dicks to each other.
I just woke up at my desk to find this all typed. Good God, what was in that drink?! Damn Secret World bars. They never seem to understand how much alcohol a human can handle! I went out to drink after the golem thing YESTERDAY! That’s how long I was out for! I’ve been blacked out for 24 HOURS! The elves are telling me they brought me right back here after I picked a fight with a gnome. That would explain why my foot hurts. Gnomes are all assholes who like to stab you in the foot. Apparently I typed on the computer and passed out. Looks like that was when I wrote the thing about unicorns. Yesterday. Well shit. And I actually had studying to do this weekend. Now my head feels like an elephant is gonna burst out of it. I’m gonna go lay in bed and whimper in pain now. Damn Secret World alcohol. Worst. Hangover. Ever.